Miracolul

Larry David – Curb your enthusiasm (Sezonul 7, Episodul 6)
via hotnews
Distracţie maximă – În fiecare zi

Larry David – Curb your enthusiasm (Sezonul 7, Episodul 6)
via hotnews

An Irish daughter of 21 years old had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her
return her father cussed her.
‘Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line?
Why didn’t ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old Mother thru?’
The girl, crying, replied, ‘Sniff, sniff….Dad….I became a prostitute…’
‘Ye, what!!? Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You’re a disgrace to this Catholic family.’
‘OK, Dad– as ye wish. I just came back to give mum this luxurious fur coat, title deed
to a ten bedroom mansion plus a 75 million savings certificate. For me little brother,
this gold Rolex and for ye Daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible
that’s parked outside plus a membership to the country club…………………… (takes a breath)
…………. and an invitation for ye all to spend New Years Eve on board my new yacht
in the Riviera and…. …’
‘Now what was it ye said ye had become?’ says Dad.
Girl, crying again, ‘Sniff, sniff…..a prostitute Daddy! Sniff, sniff.’
‘Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant.
Come here and give yer old Dad a hug.’

Un negru ajunge in Ceruri, cu frica-n san ca nu o sa fie primit in Rai din cauza problemelor rasiale…
- Numele? intreaba Sf. Petru.
- Leonardo Di Caprio, raspunde negrul.
Sfantul Petru il priveste neincrezator si-l mai intreaba o data numele.
- Leonardo Di Caprio, insista negrul, constient de faptul ca nu mai putea s-o dea la intors.
- Sfantul Petru scoate celularul, il suna pe Dumnezeu si intreaba respectuos :
- Scoate-ma te rog dintr-o dilema, Titanicul s-a scufundat sau a ars?…