Archives › Bancuri
1. Religii
C would be Judaism – it’s old and restrictive, but most of the world
is familiar with its laws and respects them. The catch is, you can’t convert into it –
you’re either into it from the start, or you will think that it’s insanity.
Also, when things go wrong, many people are willing to blame the
problems of the world on it.
Perl would be Voodoo – An incomprehensible series of arcane incantations
that involve the blood of goats and permanently corrupt your soul.
Often used when your boss requires you to do an urgent task at
21:00 on friday night.
Ruby would be Neo-Paganism – A mixture of different languages
and ideas that was beaten together into something that might
be identified as a language. Its adherents are growing fast,
and although most people look at them suspiciously, they are
mostly well-meaning people with no intention of harming anyone.
Visual Basic would be Satanism – Except that you don’t REALLY
need to sell your soul to be a Satanist…
2. Maşini
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Trei blonde blocate intr-un lift:
– Ajutooor!! Ajutoooor!!!!!
Dupa un timp una zice:
– Haideti sa strigam simultan!
– Simultaaaan! Simultaaan!!!!!
– Mai Ioane, de ce te-ai insurat?
– Pentru ca nu-mi placea mancarea gatita de mine.
– Si acum cum e?
– Acum imi place!
Era o fetita care de la o vreme avea un permanent ranjet tembel pe figura.
Ingrijorati, parintii se duc cu ea la doctor:
– Domnule doctor, nu stim ce are de ranjeste asa…
Doctorul se uita si zice:
– Ati incercat sa ii slabiti coditele?
La o ferma de pasari, o gaina face un ou de o jumatate de kilogram.
Reporteri, ziaristi, televiziuni, posturi de radio sosesc sa faca un reportaj despre incredibilul fapt!
Toti cei veniti se reped la gaina sa-i puna intrebari:
– Cum ati reusit sa faceti un ou de o jumatate de kilogram?
– Secret familial, raspunde gaina!
– Ce planuri aveti pentru viitor?
– Sa fac un ou de un kilogram!
Toti reporterii si ziaristii se indreapta spre cocos:
– Cum ati reusit acest lucru?
– Secret familial, raspunde cocosul!
– Ce planuri aveti pentru viitor?
– Sa-i sparg capul strutului!
