Lecţii de viaţă
Lesson 4
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A rabbit asked him, ”Can I also sit
like you and do nothing all day long?” The crow answered: “Sure, why not.” So, the
rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Moral of the story:To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very high up.Lesson 5
A turkey was chatting with a bull “I would love to be able to get to the top of that
tree,” sighed the turkey, but I haven’t got the energy.” “Well, why don’t you nibble
on my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.” The turkey pecked
at a lump of dung and found that it gave him enough strength to reach the lowest
branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the
second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top
of the tree. Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
Moral of the story: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it wont keep you there.
Lesson 1
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower
when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs
downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door
neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800 to drop that
towel.” After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands
naked in front of Bob.
After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 dollars and leaves. The woman
wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the
bathroom, her husband asks,…
“Who was that?” “It was Bob the next door neighbor,” she replies. “Great!”
the husband says, “Did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?”
Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with
your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.
Lesson 2
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when
they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says,
“I’ll give each of you just one wish” “Me first! Me first!” says the admin. clerk.
“I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.”
Poof! She’s gone. “Me next! Me next!” says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii,
relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina
Coladas and the love of my life.” Poof! He’s gone. “OK, you’re up,” the Genie says
to the manager. The manager says, “I want those two back in the office after lunch.”
Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.
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