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Sally, păpuşa care vorbeşte
Strategia mamei
John isi invita mama la cina. In timpul mesei, mama nu isi poate dezlipi ochii de
la colega de apartament a lui John, Julie.
De mult banuia mama ca cei doi nu sunt doar amici, iar John banuind ce se leaga la
mama lui in cap, o invita discret in bucatarie si-i spuse a mia oara ca nu este nimic
intre el si Julie in afara de plata fifty-fifty la chirie.A doua zi, Julie il anunta pe John ca nu mai gaseste sosiera de argint folosita la cina
aseara si ca ea, personal, o banuieste pe mama lui ca prea se uita la ea urat peste masa.
John ii scrie imediat o scrisoare mamei :“Draga mama, Nu spun ca AI LUAT sau NU AI LUAT sosiera de argint aseara dar adevarul
este ca ea lipseste si trebuia sa-ti trimit o notificare. Cu drag al tau John.”Raspunsul mamei:
“Draga John, NU spun ca i-o tragi sau nu lui Julie dar adevarul este ca daca ar fi dormit azi
noapte la ea in pat ar fi gasit sosiera ascunsa de mine sub perna. Cu mult drag, mama”
Familia irlandeză
An Irish daughter of 21 years old had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her
return her father cussed her.
‘Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line?
Why didn’t ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old Mother thru?’
The girl, crying, replied, ‘Sniff, sniff….Dad….I became a prostitute…’
‘Ye, what!!? Out of here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You’re a disgrace to this Catholic family.’
‘OK, Dad– as ye wish. I just came back to give mum this luxurious fur coat, title deed
to a ten bedroom mansion plus a 75 million savings certificate. For me little brother,
this gold Rolex and for ye Daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible
that’s parked outside plus a membership to the country club…………………… (takes a breath)
…………. and an invitation for ye all to spend New Years Eve on board my new yacht
in the Riviera and…. …’
‘Now what was it ye said ye had become?’ says Dad.
Girl, crying again, ‘Sniff, sniff…..a prostitute Daddy! Sniff, sniff.’
‘Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant.
Come here and give yer old Dad a hug.’
Barbaţii la 20, 30, 40 de ani
1. Sportul preferat
17 ani – agatatul fetelor
25 ani – sex, sex, biliard, fotbal
35 ani – sex, fotbal, fotbal
45 ani – fotbal, fotbal, sex
65 ani – sah, table2. Bauturi preferate
17 ani – depinde cine-l vede
25 ani – bere, “Sex on the beach”
35 ani – vodca, bere neagra
45 ani – whisky, vin vechi de 50 de ani
65 ani – ceaiuri pentru prostata