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Ubuntu Christian Edition Facts

Ubuntu Christian Edition Facts.

With Ubuntu Christian Edition, you don’t need to surf the web. You can walk on it.
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There is no abort() support in Ubuntu Christian Edition’s glibc
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Ubuntu Christian Edition was made in only seven days.
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If you uninstall Ubuntu Christian Edition, it will automatically re-install after three days.
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In Ubuntu Christian Edition, EOF is replaced by AMEN.
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Ubuntu Christian Edition’s chmod doesn’t allow 666 permission to be set.
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Ubuntu Christian Edition won’t run on Apple computers. He said not to touch them.
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Ubuntu Christian Edition hasn’t got any configuration Wizard. No superstion in serious christian systems.
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Oh, Ubuntu, you are my favorite Linux-based operating system…

Tragedie, accident, pierdere

Stephen Harper was visiting a Regina primary school and the class was
in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The
teacher asked Mr. Harper if he would like to lead the discussion on
the word ‘Tragedy’.

So our illustrious leader asked the class for an example of a
‘Tragedy’. A little boy stood up and offered:

“If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playin’ in the field and a
tractor runs over him and kills him, that would be a tragedy.”

“Incorrect,” said Harper, “that would be an accident.”

A little girl raised her hand: “If a school bus carrying fifty
children drove over a cliff, killing everybody inside, that would be a
tragedy.“

“I’m afraid not,” explained Harper, “that’s what we would refer to as
a great loss.”

The room went silent. No other children volunteered. Harper searched
the room. “Isn’t there someone here who can give me an example of a
tragedy?”

Finally, at the back of the room, little Geno raised his hand and
said, “If a plane carrying you and Mr. Ignatieff and Mr. Layton and
Mr. Duceppe were struck by a ‘friendly fire’ missile & blown to
smithereens, that would be a tragedy.”

“Fantastic!” exclaimed Harper, “And can you tell me why that would be
a tragedy?”

“Well,” said Geno, “it has to be a tragedy, because it certainly
wouldn’t be a great loss, and it probably wouldn’t be a accident,
either!”

humor

La Paşti – George Topârceanu

La Paşti

de George Toparceanu

Astazi in sufragerie
Dormitau pe-o farfurie,
Necajite si minjite,
Zece oua inrosite.
Un ou alb, abia ouat,
Cu mirare le-antrebat:
– Ce va este, fratioare,
Ce va doare?
Nu va ninge, nu va ploua,
Stati gatite-n haina noua,
Parca, Dumnezeu ma ierte,
N-ati fi oua…
– Suntem fierte !!!
Zice-un ou rotund si fraise
Linga pasca cu orez.
Si schimbindu-si brusc alura,
Toate-au inceput cu gura:
– Pin’ la urma tot nu scap!
– Ne gateste de parada.
– Ne ciocneste cap in cap
Si ne zvirle coaja-n strada…
– Ce rusine!
– Ce dezastru!
– Preferam sa fiu omlet!
– Eu, de m-ar fi dat la closca,
As fi scos un pui albastru…
– Si eu, unul violet…
– Eu, mai bine-ar fi sa tac:
Asa galben sunt, ca-mi vine
Sa-mi inchipui ca pe mine
M-a ouat un cozonac!…

Două seci

Soţul:
– Auzi, cum se face că nu ştiu niciodată când ai orgasm?
Soţia:
– Pai n-are rost să te tot sun la serviciu şi să te deranjez pentru atâta lucru.
****
– Ce oameni se înmulţesc fără a face sex?
– Pensionarii!